Saturday, June 27, 2009

How to spend your day as though it's NOT your last.

It's amazing how little it takes to waste an entire day.

For starters, try waking up late. If you can manage to remain buried under your bed sheets until at least 11:00 a.m., you're off to a fantastic start! Because then, if you take your time dragging yourself out of bed, indulge in a leisurely breakfast, and then drag your feet all the way to the shower you've probably managed to stretch out getting ready for another hour.

Try spending half an hour under the spray; make sure to lather, rinse, and repeat. A few suggestions of ways to make a shower last longer include but are not limited to:

  • Shaving
  • Washing your face
  • Making use of your back scrubber
  • Scented bodywash
  • Getting rid of that nasty dry skin on your heels that you've really been meaning to get to anyway...

  • Be creative! The above listed items are merely suggestions.

    Then, if you're like me, you'll easily use up another 30 minutes-1 hour on after-shower-activities such as moisturizer, deodorant, outfit-picking/putting-on, hair drying, hair straightening, and make-up application.

    By now, if you slept until at least 11 as recommended, it should be at least 1pm, perhaps even 1:30.

    Next comes a late lunch. A very late lunch. While it's true that hopping in the car to pick up fast food does a bad job of taking up time, it's usually what's most likely to happen on one of these ridiculously lazy days. Pick your poison, drive through, and bring it back home. Because if you eat it in the car, that's even more time you're not wasting.

    By the time you get your food back home and eat it, it's probably somewhere between 2 or 2:30. You're well on your way to wasting the whole day!

    Another thing that can eat up some time is turning on the T.V. while you eat. Chances are you'll finish your food within 20 minutes, but if you find the right show, or pop in a DVD, you'll greatly increase your chances of watching T.V. for several hours.

    By the time your eyes start to get tired, or you start to get a headache due to lack of physical activity, you'll be ready for a nap. Naps are excellent ways to relax the hours away as they can last anywhere from 30 minutes to a few hours. And the best part is, since you've spent your day doing just about nothing anyway, when you wake up from your nap you'll probably feel groggy.

    Since you probably took a nap on the sofa, your trusty remote keeping you warm, you can just sit up and turn that T.V. back on. By the time you watch one or two shows you'll probably be awake enough to realize that you're getting hungry again.

    And because you won't want to break the habit of the day by getting industrious and cooking yourself dinner, you can snag that frozen dinner out of the freezer or maybe order yourself a pizza. They deliver, you know, so you don't even have to get out.

    Don't be afraid to pop in a movie while you eat your dinner. That's another entertaining two or so hours.

    After dinner and a movie, it's likely to be about 9 or 10 pm. Which means bedtime is coming up. And since you just ate, if you give yourself another half hour the food will start to settle in your stomach and you'll inevitably want to go to bed soon.

    So there you have it! The perfect way to do absolutely nothing productive all day! Simply sleep late, take your time getting dressed and ready, drive
     through for lunch, watch T.V., nap, watch T.V., eat, watch T.V., go to bed.

    Like I said--it's almost uncanny how little it takes. If I can do it, you can do it.

    Best of luck!


    Matt Bukaty said...

    that makes my eye twitch in irritation.

    Sarah said...

    I feel for you, I really do...

    Yes, days like that can be especially irritating when they're unintentional. When it's as if all productivity just crawled under the bed and died there, leaving you with no other choice but to beach yourself on the sofa until it's time for bed.