Running In Circles

There's this weird thing that's happened to me since graduating college. I've gotten sucked into a time warp. Days are actually weeks, and weeks actually months, and then years, and it's all going by abnormally fast. My time references have changed completely. What used to feel long as a semester, now feels brief and fleeting; like a long weekend. Instead of measuring the future in class hours, counting down until the next break, I find myself going through calendars at an alarming rate. 

Surely this isn't right--surely it hasn't actually been almost four years since graduation. It just doesn't seem possible.

And the scary thing is, I'm pretty sure it's going to stay this way. I'm pretty sure life won't start slowing down again any time soon. In fact, if what folks say is really true, it's only going to keep speeding up.

Look, I'm not ready for that. I know, I feel like my last (sparse, infrequent, delinquent, sad) several posts have echoed this sentiment, but like I said, time warp. I feel like the past couple of years I've been going in circles. It hasn't been altogether unpleasant, not really. I haven't been wildly unhappy, or morose, or whatever. But now, looking back, feeling very keenly just how much time has lapsed, I'm getting anxious for the future. What's next? Where am I going? Where do I want to go? And when will I get there?

I've been thinking a lot on this lately. I started gradually stretching myself, mulling over what I might want to do with my life now that I'm Grown Up. It's kind I a scary thing, being Grown Up. I figured, as a kid, that crossing the line from Young to Grown Up would be a concrete thing; not the same for everyone, but one of those things that people say "You know it when it happens." But it's not quite like that. Still, I find myself in that frame of mind more often than not. What can I push myself to next? The ultimate question. What if I push myself the wrong way? What if I screw up? And how am I supposed to know before I try?

It's becoming increasingly important to me to spend time with myself, working on discovering more about me. It's harder than you'd think, considering there's no one I spend more time with. But it's a worthwhile thing, a thing that needs to be done. So I'm doing it. Slowly, sometimes reluctantly, and definitely with a strong curiousity as I look toward the horizon.

I want to say a brief but genuine Thank You to everyone who has and continues to follow my blog. I really can't tell you, whoever you are, all of you reading this, how much it means to me. It may not seem like much, but it's heaps to me. Some of you have been with me for years, and I know you'll have noticed the gradual stagnation here. I want to say thanks thanks thanks for continuing to follow along despite that. (And if you're only still here because you just forgot to unfollow, THANKS ANYWAY).

One of the things I'm doing as I'm trying to go back to the things I love is put more time and energy into my writing again. So if you can--if you would, stick with me some more, and let's see what Next is together.

Ring It On In

I'm starting to feel like a broken record each New Year's Eve, fondly reminiscing about the past year and utterly confused as to how the year went by so fast. And then there's the resolutions—you know, the ones you make, mentally or literally, organized numerically or perhaps by bullet point. Many of which you (read "I") will undoubtedly be struggling with before January is even over.

Still, broken record or not, it's fun to look back each New Year's Eve and be thankful for what the past year brought, and it's exciting to imagine what the coming year will bring.

This year went by so fast, and it wasn't a bad year, but there are a lot of things I want to do differently next year. Writing, for one. I've been sorely neglecting writing in every possible form. I've been awful about blogging, and I don't even want to talk about the amount of creative writing I did (or didn't) do. Also reading. Reading and writing are the two main things I'm disappointed in myself for not doing more of in 2013. So I'm keeping my resolutions list vague for 2014. You know, so I have a better shot at actually doing them.

• Write More.
• Read More.

There. It couldn't be more simple than that. My goal for 2014 is to turn out way more words than last year. And to turn way more pages. And I'm really looking forward to it. I've got some challenges already out there, carrots on a stick for my writing. And as far as reading goes, well it's safe to say my "To Read" list is never-ending, so I have no shortage of books to pick up.

That being said, I'm always taking book recommendations to feel free to share your current read! Or even your own resolutions, for that matter! I always love hearing from you guys, comments make me smile.

Anyway, au revoir 2013! It's been a good, bad, slow, fast, crazy, boring, totally rich and full year and I can't wait to see what's next.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Time Travel

What? No. No WAY has it been so long since I last posted. That's not possible. Nope. Okay, I know the phrase is, "time flies," but this is just ridiculous! I'm starting to wonder if I haven't accidentally done a little bit of fast-forward time traveling.

I can't believe how busy I've been the last month or so. My schedule has more or less doubled as far as "Things I Have To Do In A Week" goes, and I keep thinking I'm going to have some time to relax but apparently I'm not adjusting as well as I'd thought.

My work schedule has gone from a Monday through Wednesday, Four Day Weekend situation to a more typical Monday through Friday, Two Day Weekend scenario. Who knew adding two extra full days would wear me out so much? I used to job share with one other person, but she has since left the company and now it's all me. It's a small business, and I love working there, and now I'm the entire Shipping Department, and we are swamped.

I know, I know. This post is all Me, Me, ME. And excuses. Always the excuses.

But I haven't forgotten my last post, and I am SUPER excited to do this series of posts based on questions I received. Thanks so much to all who participated, and as far as I'm concerned, if you still have a question for me or a topic you'd like me to discuss, it's never too late to let me know. It might be too late once I've finished all my responses, but hey, who knows?

Seriously though, I appreciate the participation. I know I have been unreliable and irregular in my updates, but it means so much to me that people still read my blog. I love writing, and I love sharing with you folks, and I love interacting in comments, on Twitter, and on Facebook.

I'm about to start using my down time to work on those Question Response posts, and in the mean time lets be excited about some stuff together, okay??

First of all, HALLOWEEN. It's almost here! I'm so excited, even though I'm still lacking a costume, which normally wouldn't be a big deal except I absolutely must have something to dress up as when I go to work on the 31st. It's practically mandatory. See why I love my workplace??

Secondly, NaNoWriMo is less than a month away! I'm beyond excited. I have really high hopes for this year, and a couple of story ideas I'm mulling over for my NaNo Novel. Anybody else participating this year?

Thirdly, since it's almost November, it's no longer too early for me to start brainstorming how I want to decorate for Christmas this year! Let's face it, I'm kind of always thinking about how I want to decorate for Christmas.

Anyway. This is a very disjointed post, and for that I apologize. But thanks for reading anyway, and stay tuned to see your questions answered!